Tag Archives: relapse

in real life

On Wednesday, I will have had a year sober. It makes me anxious. Not for fear of relapse, though that’s there, but something else. I’m afraid I’m not doing it right. I still think I’m supposed to be someone else. … Continue reading

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out

Last night, I went to a bar. I ordered a diet coke and the bartender said “One of those nights?” and I said “Yeah,” with a sigh, even though I didn’t really know what he meant. Even though it had … Continue reading

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11 months

A couple days ago, I reached eleven months sober. A year is coming, and a dark thought occurs to me: a year would be enough. A year and I can relapse. And I can come back. There’s no part of … Continue reading

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you never know

One of the reasons I went to treatment was because I quit my job to write and didn’t spend one day in 5 months writing. Not one hour. I woke up on March 1st and looked at the calendar on … Continue reading

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New York

Recently I took a trip to New York City. I went to a meeting in SoHo. I still haven’t decided if I should name the meetings I go to, or leave the names out to increase the chances for anonymity. … Continue reading

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